5am: So THAT's where the ironing board is. I might as well get the wrinkles out while I torch. (erect board, toss pile of clothes on, head out to studio)
7am: Huh. I guess it takes longer to do its thing.
(look skeptically at still very wrinkled pile of clothes)
11am: Damn. STILL not finished?
(glare at lazy ironing board and make a tomato sandwich)
(fold up broken ironing board and shove it back in the closet.)
Me, right about now.